The Trials and Tribulations of Moving Mom

by Karen on February 2, 2017

Moving a parent can be a difficult experience. With so many errands to run and phone calls to make, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed during the process. Our employees know exactly how you feel, and have been through the same situation themselves! Read below to hear Linda’s story and how she wished she had the support of A Second Me while moving mom.

Moving boxesAt 97, my mom had been living in an assisted living home for the past few years, but it was evident that she was unhappy with her living arrangements. She often complained about the food and grumbled about the management practices at the facility. With my mom’s happiness in mind, my sisters and I decided that it was time to suggest a move. Not surprisingly, this suggestion was not met with much enthusiasm.

With mom’s half-hearted blessing, we began the process. And let me tell you, this was a process. First, we began with finding a new facility, which was more difficult than it sounds. We all spent time doing research trying to figure out if mom would benefit from continued care as well as an assisted living facility, or if assisted living was enough. Once we figured out it would be best to find a facility with both options, we had to narrow down our choices even further because it needed to be close to one of my sisters. In addition to this, it also needed to be professionally managed and provide healthy, diverse, and well-prepared meals (to eliminate some of the grumbling). After only finishing the first step of finding a place to move mom, I was already exhausted and couldn’t help but wonder whether there was some experienced service that could help us with all of these details.

After visiting two facilities that met our criteria, we unanimously chose what we thought was the better option, and set a move-in date. While we were excited to have finally found a better option for mom, setting a move-in date prompted another list of things to get done before we could officially move her to a better location. This was when I really wished that cloning were possible. Here’s a little sample of our list so you can get an idea of the frantic mess while prepping mom for the move.

  1. Buy boxes, tape, markers, etc.
  2. Separate items into move, donate, and throw out piles.
  3. Find and schedule a mover.
  4. Meet staff at new facility and get handbook and paperwork for new living arrangements.
  5. Make doctor’s appointment for mom and bring her to appointment.
  6. Call cable and phone services to cancel subscriptions at her current assisted living facility.
  7. Ensure all mail is forwarded to her new address.
  8. Complete and turn in all forms and waivers for new living facility.

After checking off all items on our to-do list (that I’m sure would have been much easier for someone else to do who actually had experience in the area), it was time to move mom. The morning of the move, we packed up all of the last minute items like the linens, bathroom towels, and essential kitchen items. The movers were thankfully on time, so they promptly came in and loaded up the truck. Mom said her last (not so tearful) goodbyes to the old facility, and got into my car to go to her new home.

Promptly after opening the door to her new apartment, two of mom’s new neighbors peeked their heads out of their doors and greeted us asking if she was the new resident. Their curiosity and genuine friendliness sparked lively conversion with my mom, and the three began to chitchat about what the latest news was at the facility. While mom was chatting, the movers arrived with her load and we helped them arrange the furniture in mom’s new apartment. While we were directing the movers, several staff members came to welcome mom and one even brought her lunch from the dining room since they figured that she would be too busy moving in to make it to the dining area.

The movers finally finished helping us rearrange mom’s furniture in her new home, so we paid them off, exhausted but grateful. The three of us didn’t have the energy to unpack any of the other boxes, so we left those for the next day. Honestly, I secretly hoped that some elves would come into mom’s apartment that night and unpack everything for us. Yes it was unlikely, but a girl can dream. We left mom in the dining room for dinner and as I looked back over my shoulder to check on mom one last time, a sense of ease finally came over me as I watched her happily chat with her new neighbors.

Moving my mom was one of the more difficult experiences that I had to juggle. The tasks themselves were not difficult, but attempting to balance helping my sisters move my mom while working was exhausting and stressful. Knowing what I do now (and where I work), I can think of so many situations that my sisters and I went through while moving mom that A Second Me could have helped with. The errand service could have helped with finding a new facility, packing up all of mom’s stuff, and organizing and arranging all of those pesky but important details involved when moving a parent from one facility to another. They could have even helped with some of the tasks that I had to complete at my home so that I could have focused more of my energy on moving mom. A Second Me basically gives you the opportunity to clone yourself to get more done, and who wouldn’t want that?

To learn more about the services that A Second Me provides, click here!

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